There are so many ways I've thought about starting this post. Talk about all the changes in Sasha's life? All the changes in our lives? How much Sasha has learned? How much we have learned? The good, the bad, and the ugly? So much to say -- so little space. Maybe I will just list some ways that my life has changed in the last three months.
1. Every morning, no later than 6:15 usually, I'm greeted with a very chipper, "Good Morning, Mommy!" This while I'm still in bed and she has barged into the room. I'm still trying to decide if I'm happy that she's the only child in our house that is that cheery in the morning or if I would prefer to just keep sleeping!
2. For the better part of the day, I have a shadow. A shadow that seeks constant attention. A shadow that interrupts any other child who also needs to talk to me. A shadow that says, "Mommy, look" about 100 times in one day and "I love you" just as many.
3. Whenever I go to the store, Sasha absolutely MUST introduce herself to the cashier, which means that I MUST then explain that she is speaking Russian . . . which then leads to a brief narrative of her story, etc. Sometime last week, Sasha just started telling the cashier (and any other random stranger) that "I speak Russian." Of course, she tells them that in English. So, again, the explanation.
4. Random things must be put away at random times. I can be in the middle of making hamburger patties and Sasha might bring me a hair barrette that was left on a table. When this happens about 50 times in one day, well . . . it's certainly motivation to put things where they belong!
5. Usually, the last thing she asks me each night is, "machina zaftra?" which means, "van tomorrow?" -- She loves going out! She gets very disappointed if I say No to that question!
6. When overly bored or not getting enough attention, she will pick fights. Just pushing those little buttons that she knows will drive her brothers and sister crazy! As I'm writing this now, a storm is brewing in the next room. Sparks will fly! Sasha has very little concept that her actions toward other people have consequences. As much as she wants love, attention, and acceptance, she does not comprehend that her own actions can make that difficult sometimes.
7. I am regularly being bossed around by a nine year old. This, of course, isn't going to work! She is learning phrases like "May I?" and "please" quite quickly now!!
8. Sasha insists on a routine at night. At first, this was frustrating -- knowing that she was just trying to prolong the agony of being forced to go to bed . . . but with a little attitude adjustment (on our part), we have learned to appreciate the things that she insists on doing -- like giving her brothers a hug and kiss! We were certainly never delayed putting the kids to bed by THAT before!
Those are just a FEW of the many ways that my life has changed. Overall, Sasha is doing really well. She is learning the language quickly -- even getting confused about what is English and what is Russian. I will be interested to see how she does talking on Skype with some other children in Ukraine right now who are being adopted. I wonder if she will intermix her English and Russian with them. I hope not! I certainly don't want her to forget her Russian, but I am being careful of how often she hears it and where since she almost had a seizure when she heard it in the doctor's office a few months ago. Speaking of doctors, we have gotten her to the dentist to have 5 cavities filled (she did great so far, one more appointment to go!), the pediatrician to rid her body of parasites, and finally to the neurologist to determine the reason for her seizures. We are waiting for test results and an MRI on that. The neurologist seems to think that she will, ultimately, be fine! She agrees that we should at least try to get her off the medication to see what happens. She is now at less than half of her original dosage on the anti-seizure medication. You may wonder why we are taking her off of the medication. Well, you have to understand that she was put on the medication 2 years before she ever had her first seizure. Often, children in institutions are put on medication to control their emotions. Instead of a hug, they get a pill.
I could go on and on about the many lessons that God is teaching me in this journey. But, they can all be summed up in the phrase, "Take up your cross daily and follow Me." I am learning that in EVERYTHING I do, I am not my own, I am His. And Sasha is His. And I must be His hands and feet to her. My time is His time. My feelings must be His feelings. My goals must be whatever His goals are for her! I still absolutely covet your prayers. I want His name to be glorified -- I want to lead ALL of my children to Christ. I truly will have "no greater joy than to know that my children walk in truth." Stay tuned for the six month update!
